It was a two hour drive from Dawn's house back to my little hovel that Sunday night. The road went through miles of open range country with no lights around other than my van's headlights. I wanted to drive fast to get home before sleep overtook me but the chance of a couple dozen head of cattle standing on the two lane just over the next hill or around the next bend kept me from flooring it.
I imagined that the telephone lines running along the highway were probably carrying a conversation between Dawn and her best friend Pamela as I motored along. It was all so strange. I didn't know what to think about those two. Had Pamela handed me off to Dawn? Was Pam really going to stay and make it a threesome before being called back home? What if anything were they up to? Then again, why should I worry? After all, with Pamela I was getting a weekly mid-day blow job nearly every Tuesday and now, with Dawn, I had just had a weekend of fucking and sucking until I could barely stay awake for the drive back home. Things could be a lot worse.
I was dead tired when I went on the air at 6AM Monday. But "the show must go on" so I plugged away. I could always count on my boss, station owner Uncle Bobby, to catch anything that wasn't good about my effort. That's not a complaint. He taught me volumes of practical skill and his criticism was always constructive. Still, I was so tired I hoped he wasn't listening for once.
While I was playing a record just after my 9 o'clock news break I took a call on the request line. It was Pam. Her husband Donnie was safely off to his business and she wanted to talk.
"Did you have a good time without me this weekend?"
"Yeah," I said. She heard me sounding a bit too carefully non-committal and laughed.
"It's OK, baby. I told you to have a good time. Dawn said last night that everything went well without me around."
"Oh, did she now?" I said.
"You have a different opinion, Wil?"
She sounded just slightly worried.
"No. It was good. Everything was good."
"Good... good...glad to hear it. You're coming by at the regular time tomorrow to go over my account, right?"
"Sure. I figured I would-- same as always," I said.
"Great! It'll be good to see you. Seems like it's been longer than a few days!" Pam said.
"Yeah, it does," I said. I had her hold on while I did a time and temp check and rolled into Grand Funk Railroad's re-make of Little Eva's The Loco-Motion.
"OK, Pam, I'm back," I said.
" Yeah...uhh.... Wil, could you pick something up before coming over tomorrow?"
"Sure," I said. It wasn't unusual for her to ask me to bring a soft drink or some cookies along when I came by the store at lunchtime.
"What do ya need?"
"A pack of rubbers."
I was speechless.
After a few too many seconds I said, "How many do you want, Pam?"
"We'll probably only need one, but you better bring some spares."
"See you tomorrow, Pam. Bye."
"See you then. Bye."
My little baby sister can do it with ease.
It's easier than learnin' your ABC's.