J: The manager showed us where we needed to park and where the back entrance to the club was and then he walked us to our rental car, and we drove back into town. I got us about three blocks away and pulled over and stopped the car and we looked at each other and just screamed in unison.
After we got back on the road Jill pointed out that we needed to figure out what to wear. Both of us had brought little black dresses and black heels just in case we had a reason to dress up. The heels could work in a pinch but fumbling with the zipper on a dress didn't seem like a winning stripper strategy. And, really, we had gotten super competitive about it. We wanted to win!
Me: You may not believe this, but hearing about the two of you planning your outfits is very interesting.
J: OK. I get it. Cut to the chase.
Me: No! I was serious.
J: Oh. Really? OK, cool, so Jill remembered the directions to the adult store and we figured we'd go there first and then the mall lingerie store and then, heck, Wal-Mart or wherever and, after dinner, we'd decide what to do. Then on Friday we'd go out early, buy everything, and have the afternoon to try stuff on and, well, frankly practice some dance moves. I pointed out that I wanted to go to the club early to watch some more girls who stripped for a living-- maybe to find out what works best.
Me: Smart. Gather information and plan a strategy.
J: Right! So, we get to the adult store and it's pretty sketchy. There was lots of cheap lingerie and looking through what they had made me start to think we were making a huge mistake. I would look at some of the stuff, picture me in it, and just feel like crying. But, Jill bucked me up and we went ahead and looked at the shoes they had. Not a huge selection-- bedroom mules with poofy feathery crap and stripper platform heels were about it. We found platforms that would work but we didn't know yet if we needed black, white, red... so, we headed off for the mall.
At the lingerie store we saw stuff that could work and that we wouldn't mind owning but it was more expensive, by far. Now we were confronted with the idea of spending $100 or more to, maybe, not win any money.
We were getting tired and frustrated so we decided to get dinner and discuss it. Jill thought I should wear white as a contrast to my skin and hair color while she leaned towards dark green or black for herself. My problem with white was that I'd be more likely to wear black if this was stuff good enough to keep and use beyond the contest. I was trying to be practical...
Me: Maybe I didn't want to know that much about the process. What did you wear? I'm very visually oriented, you know. I want to picture you.
J: Ah, so you do have a dirty mind. I wondered about that. I like it, perv! So, after all of the discussion and cold feet and back and forth we sleep on it and Friday morning we're at the mall when they open and Jill gets an adorable dark green, see-through, babydoll and g-string set with a matching shorty robe that just covers her cute little butt.
Me: And you...?
J: My, you are eager aren't you, Sweetie? Well, I bought a classy black lace underwire push-up bra, lace top thigh high stockings, in black of course, and not a g-string. I got black panties cut high on the side instead. You may not have noticed, but my rear is big and round and a g-string would look silly. But high cut panties with a little bit more material work better. Oh, I also got a satiny shorty robe in black.
Me: Sounds really hot, Janelle. And, for the record, your bottom isn't 'big and round' it's 'perfectly round.'
J: Awww... you flatterer. But, we're not done yet, Mr. Wilson. We shot over to the adult store. Jill got a pair of crazy clear Lucite platforms with a clear plastic strap over the instep so she didn't have to color match. I was going to go with the black high heels I brought but Jill talked me into black platforms.
J: Still not done, Babe. They had this section in the store with accessories... cheap junk mostly... but I found a black collar made to look like a wide leather dog collar with a silver D-ring. Jill freaked when I found it and said, 'OK, you just won $500, 'Nelle.' She almost bought a rhinestone collar but didn't. She said that I found the collars so I should be the one to wear one. For all we knew all the other bitches would be wearing one though.
Me: If you want me I'll be over there standing under the cold waterfall.
to be continued...